|1. Your richest relative
buys a new house, and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
2. You've ever been blacklisted from
a bowling alley.
3. You've ever done your Christmas
shopping at a truck stop.
4. There is a stuffed 'possum anywhere
in your home.
5. Do you consider a 6-pack of beer
and a bug-zapper quality entertainment?
6. Your lifetime goal is to own your
own fireworks stand.
7. Someone asks to see your I.D.
and you show them your belt buckle.
8. You grow your sideburns longer
and fuller because it looks so good on your sister.
9. The U.F.O Hotline limits you to
one call per day.
10. You know how many bales of hay
your car can hold.
11. You've ever used a Weed Eater
12. Hail hits your house and you
have to take it to the body shop for an estimate.
13. Jack Daniels makes your list
of most admired people.
14. Your family tree doesn't fork...
15. You see no need to stop at rest
stops because you have an empty milk jug in the car.
16. Thanksgiving dinner was ruined
because you ran out of ketchup.
17. Your watchband is wider than
any book you have ever read.
18. You view duct tape as a long-term
19. Red Man Chewing Tobacco sends
you a Christmas card.
20. After the prom you drove the
truck while your date hit road signs with beer bottles.
21. You've ever been fired from a
construction job due to your appearance.
22. You think beef jerky and Moon
Pies are two of the major food groups.
23. You've ever cleaned a fish in
your living room.
24. You've ever had to haul a can
of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
25. You actually know which leaves
make the best substitute for toilet paper.