To Appease The Gods
by Ersatz Sobriquet
is a start that I know I’ll believe in,
So I’m leaving everything behind and I breed to be a better kind.
beginning again, a bit closer to the end.
It was so cold and dark there, seething with emptiness the
likes he had never experienced before. Before him lay an endless void, a
dimension that escaped him as he clutched for a shred of understanding. It
offered none as the expanse continued on for as far as his eyes would allow. He
knew he had finally arrived, but was unaware of the qualities he would
encounter. He was going to do it, though. If for no one else but for her, he
would do it. This would make her happy. He knew it.
took a step forward, still noting the nothingness that loomed all about. He
perked his ears up, hoping to catch any sort of sound, but was rebuffed as his
soft breathing caught his senses only. Tucking his hands in his coat pocket,
trying to remain calm, in a vain attempt to show coolness even now, he began to
Almasy wasn't scared. He was never scared. He was just... unsure. Yeah, that
sounds better, he reasoned. Tough guy for life, even though he's shown his
vulnerable side many a times.
Ultimecia's defeat, he wanted to reform. That sounds so formal, he
thought. Simplest answer was the best explanation, though. He was tired of
being the bad guy. Tired of everyone hating him, who he turned into. How else
could he have people understand him without doing this thing? He wasn't evil.
Sometimes he chooses the side that will allow him to fulfill his dream, but it
doesn't deem him evil.
a sad thing what he did. Even he recognized the serious repercussions of his
actions, immediately after that act. To kill a god was nothing short of evil in
the gods eyes, and in the eyes of onlookers.
what's done is done, right? Time to move on, face facts and only hope that his
actions will go on being forgiven. Even for this grave transgression.
killing of Odin.
Ultimecia's special protector, she bestowed upon him powers mere mortals shant
possess. The energy that was surging throughout his body was nothing that would
be permanent, only exhausted as he continued to use his newly found energies.
Meeting the Master of War, Sir Odin himself, he knew his fate would be sealed
if the old warrior carried out what he knew to be so. So he attacked. He
attacked a god and killed him.
watched the withered form of Odin crash onto the floor, shocked more than
anyone that he had just committed such an atrocity. But he was Seifer Almasy.
Nothing ever shocked him, or so his reputations dictated that nothing would. So
he rode off of his own arrogance, masking the horror his inner persona was
screaming at. This disgraceful act would surely make his aggressors anger rise,
giving them want to defeat him even more so.
Squall. Reason enough for him to want to kill him many times over.
had no choice but to run away as they pressed on him so fiercely, so violently.
been walking for several minutes now, the empty void proving to be overwhelming
for even his senses, the mask of calmness slowly slipping away. He cocked his
head quickly in several directions, swearing that he heard something. Something
coming from... somewhere.
a low rumbling was heard off in the foreground as the sound intensified every
second till the source of such magnificent force seemed as if it was above his
very head. He looked up and couldn't help but gasp.
upon him with the lack of any speed involved was Quezacotl, the bird's silvery
green body shinning radiantly as electrical currents seized every area of her
even more than ten feet did the magnificent bird stop and hover in front of the
awe struck Seifer, electrical currents trying to reach out to him. Stupefied
that this magnificent creature would be this close to him, he stepped back, to
give himself more room from himself and the creature. That's what he told
himself. But he knew it to be because of sheer fear.
eyes or mouth could the young man see on the creature's face, yet words were
clearly heard ringing throughout his head.
arrrreeeeee yyyyoooooouuuuu heeeeeeerrrrreeeee?" the creature said within
some before replying, he said, "I want to apologize. Ask for your
it pressed, knowing the thing he wished to discuss.
his head as high as he could, he mustered, "The death of the Master of
howl as loud as anyone could tolerant resonated throughout his head as the
creature rose high into the void and dived underneath the "ground"
Seifer was standing on. The howl continued to ring throughout his head as he
dropped to his knees, clutching his ears, trying to save himself from going
deaf, though the sound was inside. Moments later, it ceased, and Seifer saw
that he was alone once more.
to his feet, he looked around and called out the mighty bird's name. Nothing
returned his inquiry. He began to walk a bit more before he felt his person
begin to shake. Looking down, he could see the blackness begin to turn red in
color, stretching out and staining the blackness more than a few feet in front
of him. Stepping back, the ground erupted in red, molten rocks as a huge form
emerged from it's core.
floated several feet in front of him, fire erupting from even his eyes as they
stared at him without let up. A slight grunt emitted from him with every breath
he took, disgusted to see such a man stand in front of him. His arms lay to his
side, fist balled.
came to make peace, mortal?" the fire god spoke quickly, anger backed by
every word uttered.
"Y-yes.” Seifer stuttered. He tried to remain calm,
cool. But it wasn't working to his advantage.
the human that killed Odin dare enter into this realm?" he spat back,
still seething with anger.
could only nod this time as his answer.
me this, mortal,” he questioned as he raised one of his hands to his face.
Soon, a fiery ball formed and hovered about, the sparks too intense to even
glance at. "What prevents me from hurling this at your form?"
knew that he wasn't jesting in the least, and the answer he gave had better be
a fine one. He never had a flair for words before, though. And this was no
different. Thoughts escaped him as the simplest answer could only ring clear in
his head. "Because I'm hurt and troubled by what I did. I wish only for
your forgiveness." he yelled, without malice.
was simple. And it was true. Ifrit loomed there for a bit, slightly
disappointed that he not test him, allowing him to end this pathetic mortal's
life right then and there. The two stared at each other for a moment before the
god began to descend into the pit into which he emerged from. The voracious
fiery chasm closed with a loud clamor and spewed out several molten rocks which
Seifer barely avoided before completely closing.
it's wake stood Carbuncle, the smallest of the summon monsters, one of the
protectors that aided all. Level headed in reasoning and thinking, it's young
look and appearance deceived many mortals before Seifer's time, as it age was
older than many of the other Guardian Forces.
began to walk, hobble more or less, to Seifer, between the molten rocks and
debris left by Ifrit. Once the stout creature reached Seifer, it motioned with
one of it's hands to come closer to him as he plopped to the ground. Seifer
bent over as the small god spoke, "Sit."
complied and crossed his legs as he did so. The creature’s greenish skin seemed
to be so soft and his red, beady eyes peered into the very soul of Seifer.
Those red eyes. Just like hers, he thought.
being continued to study his features, trying to understand his reasoning. He
was a very complex mortal, Carbuncle determined. "You come to make amends,
to make peace?" the summoned monster questioned. "Why?"
felt a wave of calm enter into his soul as he looked at the creature. Maybe it
was the aura it exuded. Maybe it was because those eyes reminded him of her. His
thoughts were much clearer now, able to think and reason on what led him to
come here in the first place, though.
slowly, he said, "It was because I knew I was wrong, even when I did such
a thing. I knew that it was something that couldn't even be ignored because of
my selfish want to do my lifelong dream. To be a knight and protector for my
who is your princess?" the tiny monster pushed onward. "The one with
the black, long hair?"
Not Rinoa. She was nice, but it's not her." he replied. Looking down,
realizing that this sounded new to even him, he spoke softly, "It's
Fuijin. The one that was always there for me. The one that stood by my side
even during hardships."
why not protect her?" he immediately asked, voice still soft and warped
some. "Why not protect her instead of the evil that was Gaiden?"
Seifer asked puzzled, looking up at the Summon.
one you call Ultimecia. Why protect her instead?"
Seifer mused. "Because Fuijin doesn't need my protection. She could always
take care of herself."
again it responded without hesitation. "Is that what you believe?"
know it to be so." It was Seifer this time that responded immediately as
that so?" Carbuncle again asked as he snapped his fingers, and his body
instantly contorted and melded into a ball of water that hovered in front of
Seifer's person for a bit before dropping to the ground. As soon as it did, all
it's water was released from inside and spread through the expanse on which
Seifer resided on. Standing up immediately, he wiped the water off some as the
water level rose only for a few inches.
music was soon heard from behind him as he turned around to see Siren, one of
the most beautiful goddesses he ever chanced to lay eyes on. She lazed on a
rock that seemingly rose from the ground, lying on her stomach, holding her
head in her hands. She smiled as she saw the young warrior and gestured for him
to draw nearer.
he walked, she spoke as delicately as any woman could ever speak, "Dear
warrior, you think you cannot protect the one you love?"
He was slightly taken aback by this, trying to feign slight ignorance as he
asked who was it that he was to love so. She laughed slightly at his question,
and began again, "The one you label as Fuijin. You think you cannot
protect her, your "princess"?" She still held onto a soft smile,
awaiting Seifer's response.
I never said I lo..." Seifer started, trying to defend himself once again.
laugher was enough to interrupt him as she held her head back some this time,
unable to contain the humor this mortal possessed. Finally able to relieve
herself from her limited entertainment, she again began, "Of course your
won't admit it, Sir Almasy. You’re too proud to do such a thing. But it's true.
Why else would you come here? To try to seek forgiveness if that wasn't the
case, hmm?" Her smile was so wonderful and sweet and Seifer couldn't help
but agree to the true things she spoke.
why do you love her, Sir Almasy? What makes her better than Rinoa?" She
wanted to know.
his head away for but a moment, he started to think, to explain how he could
tell her. Tell this goddess Siren that Fuijin was the only woman who seemed to
care for him. Would do his every bidding, though he knew it to be wrong. Made
him feel special and held a certain affection for him that no other woman
helped him feel. Not even Rinoa.
moved her head from side to side as she read his expressions ever so clearly
that he needed not form the words to explain what was in his heart. "I
see," she replied, still smiling ever more so. "So, why not protect
her as you sought to protect Ultimecia?"
didn't need protecting," he again replied as he did to Carbuncle.
"She’s strong enough and can take care of herself." He hoped the
answer would appease her enough. But it didn't.
not the reason." Siren said, sitting up on her rock, the salty sea air
that accompanied the water blowing her hair behind her some now. The sea creature
looked at him, still smiling, her body exposed, breast in full view, her
mermaid form’s fin moving from side to side slowly. Seifer didn't allow himself
the pleasure to gaze upon her body though.
woman needs some protection. Some sort of feeling that someone cares for them.
A knight who loves them and who cares for them the way I know you would be able
to, Sir Almasy." she spoke with words that rang certain truths to Seifer.
"Why do you not look upon my body, Seifer? Many mortals before you have
said that I am the fairest of all women on your plane of existence."
remained locked on the beautiful creature's face, eyes not looking elsewhere.
He would feel hurt had he felt something for another woman. As he already did
twice. Once with Rinoa. And once with Edea then, Ultimecia. He felt he betrayed
Fuijin each time. How she coped, he'll never know.
smiled as the reasoning was so clear and obvious to even her. "It's
because you love the one called Fuijin. That is why. Is this why you are here?
Do you think you can make her happy by doing this thing, Sir Almasy?" she
spoke surely and passionately.
was the only thing Seifer could utter. To make her happy by being a good
knight. Renouncing my evil ways once and for all. His thoughts spoke.
you think that she'll love you because you would do this thing?" she asked
already does," he replied softly, looking away some.
continued to smile as she once again asked him this thing he refused to give
answer to, “But I want to know why you feel she doesn’t need your protection,
Sir Almasy. You still have yet to respond.”
still couldn’t bear to look her way, fiddling with his hands some now, trying
to give an answer she would be satisfied with. “I guess.” He began, mumbling
some, “I didn’t want to… Protect her before because...” It was too hard to
explain this thing to the exquisitely fine creature that sat before him, his
thoughts clear, but the words mangled. “Suppose I were to loose her? Even as a
friend? I… I don’t have anyone else, any other girl like her. I was afraid to
cross that line, I guess.” It was the best answer he could manage.
smiled some before saying, “Sounds like human thinking. Human worries. Dear
Seifer Almasy, try not to allow your mind to play leader over you at all times.
Let your heart lead the way for you once and a while.” Cocking her head to the
side, she continued, “Like your allowing it to do now.”
looked up at her at that last comment, realizing that it was true. He was doing
most of this, if not for himself, if not to please SeeD, and even for these
gods he labeled as summon monsters, but for her. He could only nod at her,
taking to heart what she just mentioned.
smile remained on the goddess face, never letting go. Changing the subject
some, she said, "Let me ask you this, dear Seifer. Do you think Odin would
live on forever?"
back to the beautiful sea creature, he answered surely, "Of course. Summon
monsters can live forever."
giggled at this response. "Can we?" she questioned him.
watched her until he felt something fly past his head, the wind that it carried
tussling his hair some. Looking around the place, he finally looked back at
Siren who pointed behind him. Turning around, he saw something so terrifying,
even he screamed in shock.
was Diablos, and accompanying him was various little winged monsters, demons
perhaps. His wings glided along the currents that suddenly picked up and he
laughed, a laugh that was as deep and evil, warped and resounded more than he
could have ever imagined it to be. It seemed to be dancing in the air, fueling
off of Seifer's fear more than anything else.
winged monsters that were Diablos’ doing flew around Seifer, cackling and
laughing at the thought of this human here, in their midst. Standing next to
Diablos was Cerberus, the three-headed hound, muscles ripped throughout his
body. Diablos ceased his laughter momentarily to look upon him before beginning
to laugh once more. Looking back to the scared Seifer, he asked, "You
think that we are eternal?!" His voice was gravelly, backed with a slight
echo the whole while.
amounts of smoke emitted from the beast’s mouth as he waited, a seemingly grin
on his face, wanting an answer to come from Seifer.
it was his turn to answer this one, he replied a bit unsure, "Yes. That's
what I was told." It was the only answer he could give.
caused Diablos to laugh once more, humored at this mortal’s ignorance.
"Nothing is eternal! Nothing last forever! Nothing is more surer than
death! Me!!!" The greatness laughed again at this young one's ignorance to
the matter, as did his little winged creatures. The ones that were no longer
flying over his head and that had rested by Seifer's feet pointed and laughed
at him, also shocked by the young man's ignorance.
the laugher began to wane from the huge creature as he gazed upon him once
more. "Even Odin was destined to die in his lifetime. All warriors die.
Even you, mortal." the beast smiled at the thought.
might be true..." Seifer began before he was cut off.
Might?!! It is true, boy! Nothing will ever live and survive as long as I
exist. And this is something that will always be." he bellowed, his
creatures making agreeing noises.
his head down, trying to gather the proper words, he again attempted, "It
is true," he began, but stopped short, wanting to make sure the god wasn't
going to interrupt him once more. When he allowed him to speak, he continued,
"It's true that all things will die. Even me. But, I know I shouldn't have
been the one to end Odin's life. I was not destined to do so, and I know
small grin crept up his face as he knew the young man to be sure of this. Knew
him to feel a deep sorrow for the thing he had committed. "Even the most
unlikely thing can kill, boy." he spoke low and in a even tone as a the
winged monsters that stretched out before him made room as a small Tonberry
walked ever so slowly to him.
knew what such a creature was able to do. The power it possessed, and he wanted
to move. To get out of there, but his muscles proved to be too stubborn at the
time. He watched slowly as the Tonberry was soon not much more than two feet in
front of him, the knife this god would often carry around still shimmering in
his hand as the oil lamp produced it's light that was held in his other hand.
Closer, closer, and then it stabbed.
Seifer's world went dark.
didn't know how long he was out, was dead he assumed. He was still a bit
confused where he was, but it was empty. That same void stretched out before
him that he recognized from before. The pain in his side was great, and looking
down, he saw the wound released large amounts of his blood, staining the white
coat he wore, and his pants and shirt. He continued to lay there, not even
enough strength to hold his wound.
lay there as the implications of what Siren said still resounded in his head.
That it was true. He really did love Fuijin. When everybody doubted him, she
was always there for him. Even when he was going to the extreme, she wanted to
help him, make him better. She would tolerate his attitude, his outlook of
life, but she didn't like it, and he knew that.
it was when Ultimecia was defeated that he recognized that he loved her more
than he could imagine. The fact that she wanted to help him even with half of
Garden wanting his head. She always held steadfast to Seifer. Always. And he
knew it to be because she looked to him more than a friend. She loved him more
than anyone else.
though? That same infernal question plagued him even as he lay there, trying to
figure and put it all together. She loved him and he never knew why. He
probably did know why, but the GF use probably neatly erased that thought from
realizing that she did love him, that she did want to do the good things in
life again like before when she and Raijin and Seifer were apart of the
disciplinary committee, was when his want to do good, reform and change, came
even stronger. He made a formal apology to the Garden, did everything he could
to make amends and show that he wasn't the enemy anymore. It was probably the
hardest thing he ever did, changing his whole person around.
arrogant, aggressive, competitive. These were all his fine qualities he'd grown
to like, and was forced to throw them all away. All because of one unlikely
woman whom he knew he loved but never admitted to. Women can make you do the
craziest things, Seifer, he thought.
thing he was doing now, talking to the GF's as if they were near was something
that was outlawed by the R&D team of Balamb Garden. It was proven that GF's
could inflict memory loss, and their use became more and more restricted. But,
something like this was completely banned.
to them. Junctioning a GF and going into sort of a trance, allowing you to talk
to them. Seifer went all out and junctioned them all, hoping to talk to whoever
would allow him too. One wouldn't. Two wouldn't.
Crap. he remembered saying as he
just juctioned them all together. No GF guide ever related an experience like
this ever occurring and Seifer didn't know how this would affect him, but
killing Odin troubled him more than he ever put on.
was his idol. He often read about the god, the summon monster and wondered if
him to be true. The power this god had was something that intrigued Seifer to
no end, a true warrior. A true knight. Seeing him ride on his eight legged
horse though, running to him full speed that day, he knew it to be truer than
anything he could recall and also knew his fate if he didn't act.
didn't want to do it. But he was left with little choice. The blow was sure and
deadly. And the god was no more. And apart of Seifer was also no more.
then, no GF would offer his help. He was since a SeeD once more, and when he
went off on away missions, almost lost his life several times as the GF's he
was junctioned to refused to offer their assistance. He knew he needed to do
this thing. To gain their respect once more and to also apologize and mourn for
causing the death to the greatest warrior.
it seemed that he wasn't going to be offered the chance as he lay there on the
cold nothingness, blood still seeping out of his system. Closing his eyes, he
thought that this was what death felt like. To die as an icy cold wind caught
straight up, he saw Shiva, hovering with her body stretched out over his,
looking and peering into his eyes, not more than a few inches from his face.
She was also magnificent in appearance, her icy blue skin seeming to glisten
some. He could do nothing but look back at her person and watch her she began
care about the death of Master Odin? We thought your heart to be as cold and
icy as the touch of my skin." she said evenly, her icy breath cooling the
sweat droplets from off his face, moving her hand to brush against the side
where his gash lie.
flinched some at the icy touch, but locked his gaze on the icy queen before
him. "He was the greatest." He spoke. "And I killed him, through
powers not my own. But I killed him nonetheless."
allowed her hand to hover around his affected area for a bit as she continued
to speak, "But, as Diablos said, he was to die soon. You seem to be not
the one to care about such things. Why do you care?" Her head moved slowly
from side to side and Seifer could be nothing less than entranced by her blue
eyes. Her lips brushed his nose twice as she moved back and forth, examining
all the features of his face.
I do care. I tried to hide it." he whispered.
she asked inquisitively, moving her head up in slight surprise at his answer.
that was the only way I knew how." was his only response. And it was true.
He only knew how to mask and hide the emotions that he held within himself for
so long, people assuming that he was the monster he portrayed that he decided
to keep his real zeal and love of life a secret.
could have been the death of you, Seifer." the cold queen responded.
know," he acknowledged, turning his head away slightly.
said nothing as she only continued to stare at him, waiting for his eyes to
return her look. He finally did turn and gazed into her eyes as she rose slowly
from off him and began to float away.
wound didn't hurt as much anymore and he struggled to his feet, looking around
the place, trying to see if he could still catch a glimpse of the ice queen.
But she was nowhere in sight. Hand on wound, he looked around, wondering who
else was going to question his loyalty. His integrity.
when he saw his shadow extend and reach out as far as he could see, light
emanating brightly from behind him. Turning, he saw the bird, the life giver
Phoenix float before him in magnificent glory and honor. Her wings stretched
out wide on both sides and feathers, small and large fluttered to the ground as
they flapped slowly, holding her place. The orange light was a marvel to behold
as Seifer covered his eyes some to the creature's strong aura.
come to make amends? With yourself and with us, little one?" it spoke,
voice soft and child-like.
Phoenix." he whispered.
wish for all sins and pass transgressions to be forgotten and wiped clean,
little one? For you to be able to start anew?" the creature again asked.
was all he could muster.
you do this because you feel wrong? You feel that things should be different
than what they are, little one?"
he again replied. "I know I can't change the past. But I can seek
forgiveness. I wish to have your blessings."
is something you wish us to bestow, little one?" the creature again asked.
you swear to protect lives then? Do you promise you will always do what is just
for the rest of your mortal existence, little one?"
swear it, Phoenix." Seifer could only reply.
bird hovered there for a while, contemplating what it was she was about to do.
Finally, she spoke, "Very well. All your sins and pass transgressions are
now atoned for. Leave this plane of existence and go back to yours, protecting
what you deem as proper and right."
could slowly feel his wound heal, the blood leaving him and even retreating
from off his clothing. He looked back at the bird, letting the glory fill him
some as he said, "Thank you, oh great Phoenix."
bird merely floated there for a moment before saying, "Go now. Behind
there sat Bahamut, the expansive dragon's wings resting across the void.
Looking at him, he heard the Phoenix’s voice say, "Ride him out of this
walked over the beast and looked at him some before boarding his back. The
beast made not a verbal sound as his wings began to flap and the two rose high
into the air and then began to move forward. The immense speed the King of
Dragons was moving at was much greater than Seifer could ever imagine the beast
to move and struggled to hold on for dear life.
Seifer could start to see tiny dots laced around and about the darkness he knew
could only be stars until the mighty beast completely stopped mid-flight
causing Seifer to be thrust off. As he fell, looking up at the Dragon god, he
knew this to be the end and only wished that he could see her again. To tell
her that he loved her. To tell Fuijin that he loved her.
then... he woke with a start, on the floor of his room, gunblade to his side,
with it junctioned to the core with Guardian Forces. He sat there in a cold
sweat, still fully clothed.
it a dream?
He knew it had happened. He went to their world and asked for forgiveness. And
they accepted it. They understood him and helped him understand himself more
than he ever thought possible. He accomplished his first task to his new life,
and to make things better. Now, he only had to continue making it better. They
gave him their blessings and he wouldn't forsake such a thing.
struggled to his feet and walked over to the window and looked out, watching
the stars fight for a spot in the sky as a slight cloud layer crept along. They
gave him forgiveness. Gods in his eyes. If they could forgive him, anyone
could. It would take hard work... but it just might happen.
would talk to Fuijin. Tell her how he felt. That he loved her. No matter the
outcome. He needed to get it out in the open. That would be the second
significant step to his new life. After that?
grinned as he looked to his junctioned gunblade. "Whatever the gods see
been wanting to do a summon monster story for the longest time, but no
inspiration, and I wasn’t about to force it. So I put it on the back burner for
years. But after I wrote So I Pulled, I really had the creative juices
going, so this came out. I’ve always wanted to do a Seifer story, but not in
the same angst way everybody else’s been doing. Making him want to reform, but
for a cause, his love of Fuijin really helped this along and allowed me to put
many pieces together.
that I was really working on was the imagery as well as distinct personalities.
Came across pretty darn good, in my opinion (which doesn’t really count). In any
event, though, I think this turned out for the better and I really hope you
guys and gals enjoyed this.