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Credits Narrater - Bill Roper Locke Cole - Himself Gau - Himself Board of Health Official - Simon Tarsis Edgar Figaro - Himself Celes Chere - Herself Police Officer #1 - Brian Williams Insurance Agent - Robert Gifford Sabin Figaro - Himself Doctor Lugae - Himself Unemployment Clerk - James Taff Police Officer #2 - Rebecca Long Ultros - Himself Soldier who raises hand at meeting - Kyle Fredsen Richard Simmons - Himself James Earl Jones - Himself Jackie Chan's Agent - Jonathan Shuler Gwar - Themselves Bill Ranford - Himself The Duck in the Corner - The Duck on the Hood of the Car Snarf - Himself Terra Branford - Herself Cyan Garamonde - Himself John - Chris Latta Jokey Smurf - Himself Brainy Smurf - Himself Ugly Smurf - Himself Insideout Smurf - Himself Papa Smurf - Himself Rocket Control Soldier - Peter Cullen Setzer Gabbiani - Himself Mog - Himself Umaro - Himself Hand of DooM Communications Officer - Danny Delk Fred, the Gunner - Krug Partinov Charles Valroth - Charles Faraone Rene Gaudin - Himself Also Starring Jay Wilbur - Head Lawyer Tiger Woods - Golfer #1 Julia Childs - Chef Arnold Palmer - Golfer #2 Richard Nixon - Dead Soldier Drugy Smurf - Himself -- Original Idea - Cody Faraone Director - Charles Faraone Writing-Part One - Cody Faraone Writing-Part Two - Cody Faraone, Charles Faraone Writing-Part Three - Cody Faraone, Charles Faraone Writing-Part Four - Charles Faraone -- Music - John Williams, Nobuo Uematsu, Robert Prince III Digital Effects - Industrial Light and Magic Matte Artists - Relm Arrowny, Ralph McQuarrie Foley recording - Charles Faraone Ninja Expert - J.J. -- Credits for the remastered "Rise of Locke's Mafia" Digital Remastering - THX, a division of Lucas Digital. Voice of Jabba the Hutt - Howard Stern (Imitating Newt Gingrich's Mother) All Around Cool 3D Stuff - John Carmack The Art To Go With It - Adrian Carmack (No relation to above) -- Nuclear Fusion Cannon provided by the French Government. Windows 95 appears curtesy of Uncle Bill and the Microsoft Corp. -- Hand of God Rip-Offs Number 0 -"Do you have a pen and paper? Are you writing this down?" Calvin & Hobbes, Revenge of the Babysat Number 1 -"No one can EVER defeat me!" Final Fantasy IV Number 2 -"I already do." Wing Commander IV Number 3 -"This pile of rubble...etc." The Transformers, Mini-series #1: More Then Meets the Eye Number 4 -"Locke Cole's First Strike" Jackie Chan's First Strike Number 5-"Snarf control box" Transmogrifier, Calvin and Hobbes Number 6-"Locke's favorite decoration" Return of the Jedi Number 7-"Join me, we can rule...etc." Empire Strikes Back Number 8-"Please, listen to me. That jerk Locke...etc." Diablo Number 9-"The Shuttle Scene" Return of the Jedi Number 10-"Wait! I've always wanted to do this!" Ghost Busters Number 11-"It all comes down to this." The Zork series Soundtrack available soon. No animals were harmed during the making of this film. All scenes in which the animals appeared were filmed under the supervision of the A.S.P.C.A. (We can get away with saying that because we don't consider Smurfs animals.) The producers wish to extend their gratitude to the following: The Government of Figaro The New Doman Government The Imperial Navy The Towns of Nikeah, Tzen, Albrook, Miranda & South Figaro Winnibago Industries The Xerox Corp. iD Software SquareUSA And last but certainly not least: Our parents, without whom this story would have been difficult to write. This is entirely a work of fiction. Any similarities between these characters and any real persons, alive or dead, is purely intentional. This film is protected by an ancient egyptian curse. Any tampering or illegal copying may lead to Mumm-Ra, The Ever-Living paying you a visit. Filmed in 16-bit colour. Maintained by: |
